The Middle Road

When I was young, I longed for a middle name.
My parents didn't award one to the girls in our family at my Mom's insistence that once married we would never use a middle name again (she didn't) so I was middle nameless for the first 23 years of my life. Of course, not having a real middle name didn't stop me from making up one of my own. In bold childhood scrawl you can read it on all my first grade papers:

Jennifer Jane.

My brothers still tease me relentlessly about it, but I thought it had a lovely ring.

Once married, I did indeed move my maiden name to the middle slot and for the first time was the proud owner of a middle name. It appears on my drivers license as well as my passport. I sign legal documents with that name smack in the middle between my first and last. Though certainly it doesn't carry the same ring as my self imposed JENNIFER JANE, it does carry the legacy of who I am and so it will do.

For the past 18 years I have been proudly identified as Jennifer Gwilliam Taylor. No worries, no questions, no problems.

And then I got a job in The Netherlands.

As best as I understand it here, all work documentation for a married woman needs to be done with her maiden name as the identifier. Suddenly at my intake with the HR department I became Jennifer Taylor-Gwilliam.
Fine. No worries, no problem.

Except.

That's not how my identification reads and for whatever reason, or set of reasons, it took positively FOREVER for those working on my file and/or writing my contract for the school year to get their minds around the fact that what LOOKS like my middle name is indeed my maiden name.

Yes, hi Jenn. I just have another question about your maiden name.

Sure. okay.

Yes, my question is what is your maiden name? I see we have here written that it is G-W-I-L-L-I-A-M but on your passport that name is your middle name.

Right. In the states, as is custom, when I married, my maiden name became my middle name.

Yes, all right. So your middle name is your maiden name?

Yes. That's exactly right.

So you don't have another middle name?

No, I have no other middle name.

Just your maiden name?

Right. My maiden name is my middle name.

Yes, okay, I think I understand.

Before you think to yourself that a single conversation sorted this controversy I am going to ask you to think again. And then think again. Right after you are finished thinking, please commiserate with me over the fact that I have had this conversation or some version of it no less that 7 times in the last two weeks.

A middle name is proving to be the bane of my existence.
I really should have stuck with Jane.

AND NOW, with that exceptionally long introduction I am going to play a tag given to me by both Gunfighter and Songbird. I don't really know the rules and even if I did I am bound to not follow them. If you really want the details I am sure you can scout it out for yourself. But as I remember, I am supposed to define my middle name by identifying something about myself with each letter.

G--Grateful. The gratitude list in my life is endless. I am exceptionally grateful for my family, immediate and extended, and for my friends.

W--Willful. As in unbelievably stubborn. But only when it comes to personal expectations and goals. In all other things I am a great team player.

I--Insightful. And occasionally creative.

L--Loving. Even to spiders and other creepy-crawlers. I will carefully scoop them up and carry them tenderly to a new place to make a better home for themselves than say, spinning a web on my bike handlebars or living inside my shoe.

L--Loved. Lucky, lucky me.

I--Inspired. By my friendships; my relationships; and the beauties of the earth.

A--Attached. To people, to sentiment, and to truth.

M--Mixed up and a little confused. But that's what keeps me interesting, right?

You want to play? Then, tag! You're it!

Inquiring Minds

Tagged by His Greatness--Sir Gunfighter--for 8 random facts about me, I will tell you that:

1. In truth, random describes me perfectly. There is hardly a thing about my personality or my life that is planned or systematic in any way. Other than:

2. My headaches, which come like clockwork with the release of certain substances and/or materials in my body. Too cryptic for you? I shall spell it out. I am a slave to my ovaries and my hormones. It's not pretty and it has been getting increasingly uglier and fiercer as I age. However, whether it is because of, or coincidentally to, the acupuncture treatments I am receiving, I am celebrating:

3. The random victory of being headache free this week, in spite of what the calendar shows. This week should have, would have, begun with a screaming-mimi of a migraine. And it didn't.

4. I believe in acupuncture.

5. I practice Reiki.

6. I love yoga.

7. I am not afraid of spiders but I abhor moths. I understand it's an irrational fear, but it is deeply rooted all the same. When I was a camp counselor, oh, about 1000 years ago, my campers found out about my distaste for the critters and filled my cabin with creative paper cutouts of the horrible hideous beasts as a prank. I was pleased to see that in each rendition, my 12-year-old charges had also penciled in vampire-like fangs at the mouth, as that is exactly how I envision and describe them. I have never been close enough to one to really inspect whether my theory is true and don't tell me I should, I won't. I am comfortable with my story that the fuzzy monstrosities also have fangs. I'm stickin' with it.

8. On a whim, I got a job this week. Yes, you read that correctly. I. am. going. back. to. work. FULL TIME. I will perhaps post in detail how an innocent email exchange with the Headmaster at the International School suddenly became a job interview. But that certainly sums up the randomness of my life. Four days ago I didn't have a job, and today I do.

Now, I'll be needing a nanny. Inquiries about the post can be made here.

**************************************************

Speaking of inquiries. It has come to my attention via some random email questions that perhaps there are parts of my story about our life here, that I haven't told yet. So, my question to you, dear friends and readers, is what do you want to know? Other than the back story of what brought our family from the USA to The Netherlands (this is the question which has come in a few times over the email), what are the burning questions in your mind about me? About us? About life in Holland?

Ask away, and I will post in coming days, until you know the rest of the story.

For Those About To Rock

If I talk about the rush you get when you are handed an unexpected gift will you understand what I am trying to say? You know:

• The warm sensation you get in your head while reading those just right words on a Hallmark that someone in your life chose for you?


• The giggle that rises up in your chest when a child hands you a flower plucked from the garden because he wanted to give you something?


• The inner joy that settles into your heart when arms are thrown around you and a big hug with a best friend happens?

This rush.

The rush of opening the front page of one of your favorite bloggers, to find out she's given you something.

A little something, sure.

But big too.

Paige thinks I rock.

It's the Rockin' Girl Blogger award that is winging through the blog world. I was so excited to see my name on her nominee list, but even more astounded by the words she wrote behind it. Meaningful on many levels, but most of all because I think she rocks!

And anyway, I get this cool button.

And I get to pass it on.

Pass the envelope please.

My nominations (listed in no particular order) for the Rockin' Girl Blogger award are:

1. Teri.
Initially, when I typed in the #1 character, I left my finger on the shift key and got '!' instead. I should have left it as it is totally indicative of Teri's blog and personality. She is a firecracker if ever there was one, and she is darn proud of it. On the front page of her blog she proudly displays the warning signs for the content within. She's proud of that too. I am proud to call her my friend.

2. Leslie
I found her blog originally on a Wordless Wednesday and immediately fell in love with her darling daughter. Then, as I lingered there I knew this was a place I would be returning often. In fact, I bookmarked her place immediately upon reading this post which sent me into fits of laughter. I get that giggle every time I visit now, which as it turns out is every day. Leslie is one of those really real people. I am so impressed with her candor and wit but most of all by her genuineness.

3. Allison.
If you've read me for long, you know my feelings for this blogger run deep. She has been my teacher and guide as I have gotten my feet wet in the blogging world. In addition she has been a loyal friend via the email route too. She is wicked smart and a lovely human being who chases the big causes with a passion. She is most passionate about her marriage and her children. I admire her deeply and look forward to the day our paths will cross in the offline world.

4. Kiki.
I met Kiki through the Friday Fifteen and we have a weekly date at one another's blogs. I love to read her thoughts and insights about her life as an army wife (currently) and her personal experiences in the army (recent past). This is another "girl" who is refreshingly honest and openly candid, who fills me with inspiration every time I read.

5. Shelby.
This was one of the first blogs I tripped across after my foray into the universe, I don't even remember how I found her. But I do remember that she already had me linked on her sidebar and that totally blew me away. I thought it was just so nice. Of course, I lingered there enjoying her words, her photographs and her insights immensely. I admire her deeply and I am happy as can be to spend time with her.

Now, Rockin' Girls, it's time for you to pass the torch. Pick five and pass the award along.

And, by the way, I salute you!

O Slalom Meme O

I am dodging again; bobbing and weaving down the court. This can't be construed as a full fake because at some point I intend to do it.

Someday. Just not today.

This evasion I am speaking of is the ducking of tags for Memes which I have not yet bothered to reply to, nor justify with a response.

My thinking is that I will play one of the all about me games that get passed from blog to blog as soon as I run out of things to say . But I haven't done that yet and I actually don't know when I will. So I keep pushing them back and trying to crowd them out of my mind, replacing the nagging need to post something about me with a post about poop. Or something else.

I was really thinking that this was a simple cut and run.

But it struck me that I have a way around the bloggers guilt I am feeling. And that is this. I can link my taggers anyway. And I can encourage you readers to go read them, get to know them, give them some traffic. And thus assuage my shame.

It's a good move don't you think? Maybe I should have coached basketball.

Today, I will talk about the Three Taggers that I am delinquent on linking. And soon there will be a post with more linky love, as I discovered when I opened my email this morning that I had been tagged again. And again. And again.

But y'all have to wait your turn. Because today, I link you to:

Gunfighter, who writes The View From Here. He tagged me to play a spotlight game and I was honored, really honored, that my name showed up in a post of his. You see, he is witty, and wise; intelligent, and controversial. I love that about him. Oh, and he cooks too! His place is a daily (often more than once) stop for me. You should get to know him. And if you're so inclined, send him something to shoot. He'd like that.

Next, I want to introduce you to Csara. She writes at Baby Talkers. She is also the leader of the pack at the Friday Fifteen. Csara is a busy writer, wife and mom, and I would love it if you would stop over at her place and join in a discussion. She would love that too.

The Not Quite Crunchy Parent is the third link for today. In truth, I found this tag by accident when I was reading through the archives at her place. But the game, or meme rather, I was tagged for was a cute one so I thought I would play.

Someday. Not this day.

I love this blog, because so much of what gets said there is stuff I can really get my mind around, and my heart behind. It's a fun read.

And finally, I want to do something a little unconventional. Since this friend is a bit on the unconventional side, I figure this works. I want you to meet my friend Becca. Becca is someone I know in my offline life. She doesn't keep a blog, though she really should, and she has only recently discovered mine--being that I am not very good at "tooting my own horn"--but she dove into the fun of it headfirst. As proof of her humor, her candor, and her zest for life I direct you to the comment section of this post, and this one. She's just a lot of fun, and is a good friend to me. A very good friend. I intend to have her guest blog here sometime soon but any encouragement you want to give for her to open a page of her own and share her hilarious stories and experiences, I will receive in my inbox. You can post a comment here or send an email and I will pass those onto Becca.

That my friends, as they say, is that. Tag me and I'll link you. And someday, I will play the game you passed along.

I promise.

Games People Play

So there is this gaggle of games in the blogging world and just like the best of childhood play it involves tagging friends. And she who is "it" gets to holler out "no-tag-backs"! I got touched twice this week by two different taggers for two different games.

I am going to play them both in one post.

And I am boldly going to let the buck stop here. And it's not that I am not a big fan of these games, or memes rather, because I really am. I love to trip upon them on others' blogs and read all the cool and juicy tidbits of information the writer chooses to share. The reason I am not thrusting the game upon others is simple. I am only just making friends in this big beautiful blogging world and I don't want to annoy or pester any of these fresh relationships with a meme which someone may or may not want, but would be too nice to complain about. Besides, both of these games call for an unreasonable amount of tags to happen, as in 10 and 8 respectively. And that adds up to: A LOT. To be perfectly honest, I just don't want to have to think that hard about which somebodies to pass it on to.

Lazy? Perhaps. But you didn't hear that from me.

Now, having put all that in print I feel compelled to add this. If you are interested or keen to play one or both of these games then by all means consider yourself tagged. And please tell me when you have posted so I can come by and read the cool, amazing and interesting things about you. Reading that kind of stuff seriously floats my boat. If you would rather post interesting things about yourself in the comments section of this blog, then feel free to do that. Only if it's 10 things, please do it in ten comments instead of one, so it will make my comment numbers soar. That kind of stuff really, really gets the boat rockin' for me.

So, sound the whistle. Start the clock. The tournament now commences.

Thanks for the tag to this game, Brillig. And thanks for the nod on your sidebar too.

And Anno? I twisted your tag just a little and instead of 8 random facts about me, I turned it into, well, you can read onward to find out what I did. I just wanted to shake it up a little bit so this post wouldn't be too awfully boring and long winded.

Oh, right, like I could ever be long winded!

First then: 10 ULTIMATELY INTERESTING FACTS ABOUT ME

1. When I was seventeen years old I did a McDonald's commercial. Really. I was 'discovered' straight out of drama class at Skyline High School in Salt Lake City. I think the talent agents were looking for fresh Utah faces for this campaign and they liked mine. Or rather, what they really liked was my voice. My face they said, after a series of auditions and screen tests, was "too young looking". So they didn't cast me for the screen part, but it was my voice you heard-dubbed in-all over the western United States for the "Your order in less than a minute" ad campaign of 1983. I also did the radio spots. And the follow up tags when they re-ran the campaign later on in another part of the U.S.
That whole face-too-young-looking thing was a total annoyance at seventeen. Having the same problem at forty-one? Not nearly so bothersome.

2. My first major-venue performance was at The John F. Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts in Washington D.C. when I was eight years old.

3. I have danced in International venues since then including Sweden and Canada. As well as throughout the United States, with loads of concerts within Utah, which strictly speaking is a foreign place in its own right.

4. I took my 25+ year dancing/performing career and became a P.E. Teacher at Awakening Seed School in Phoenix. I taught there for six years. It was an awesome gig.

5. I can reach my nose with my tongue. Yeah, I have skills. My daughter can also do this which is my only claim that I had anything to do with her looks-just-like-her-daddy genetics.

6. I gave birth three times without so much as a Tylenol. Maybe that's not so impressive until you factor in that labor with my youngest was a 20-hour affair.

No, no applause please. Just throw money.

7. I love to eat green salad and a baked potato. Together. Not just cohabiting on the same plate, but together. Meaning, I prepare the potato by splitting its jacket in the center and tossing in the butter, sour cream, salt, pepper, and other what-not. Then I build a salad on top and crown the whole thing with ranch dressing. The dual effect of hot/cold, soft/crunchy is in a word: Fabulous.

8. I am a voracious reader. I love a book. Almost any book. I have been known to finish total drivel, just because I don't want to be without one. I tend to disappear completely into its world once I have cracked the cover. In Elementary School I often was 'caught' reading my novels behind the history or social studies texts. Since motherhood descended I have to be a bit more discriminate in my timing before I pick up a book and withdraw into the prose. After all, the children need to eat sometimes...

9. I have to be the lamest, slowest, worst SMSer on the planet. Seriously. Every time I try to text it takes me FOREVER to find the letters. It is a ridiculously arduous process for me and my friends on the other end have already finished croissants and cappuccino before I can respond to the invitation "Koffie?" with a simple "Ok".

Here's the perfect example: Today I was attempting to send a quick message to my friend to let her know that Andrew and I were a little late getting to the bus stop and therefore I would be a few minutes behind our scheduled meeting time. (She and I had a spa date while our boys were at peuterspeelzaal). I diligently pushed the buttons on my mobile phone and got myself all wound up and hyperventilating over the fact that I was able to punch in "Bus late" in under five minutes. So then instead of adding "Be there soon" as was my original intention, I typed the same sentence (two words is a sentence, right?) again. So now my message read "Bus late bus late" . Sheesh. I deleted my mighty effort and got the words "but coming" typed in sometime before our thirty-minute bus ride was complete. I sent the message on it's way and I kid you not within seconds, my friend had texted back some novel length reply. I didn't dare send anything in return. I figured by the time I found the letters spelling "C U soon" I would have already seen her, had my toenails painted and arrived back home.

10. I sing in the shower. I have a fantastic repertoire of show tunes and 1940's torch songs. I can also belt out The Star Spangled Banner like nobody's business.

Oh, yeah, I am a diva. A wet, soggy, shower-singin' diva.

And now: 8 RANDOM THINGS I HAVE ACTUALLY SAID TODAY

1. "Are you serious? You threw your yogurt behind the heater? Why? Why? Why?"

2. "I'm not listening to you.... you're crazy" (said in my best Nacho Libre accent.)

3. "Hey dude. The stinky shoes in the front hallway? Can they go away soon, please?"

4. "HOLY CHOCOLATE CAKE BATMAN! This is soooooo good."

5. "Plug the earphones into the television please. No one out here needs to be subjected to The Nanny's voice"

6. "Nee! Nee! Nee! Dit is niet voor jouw!"

7. "Wow, so these wet socks on the radiator? Are these going to be a permanent part of the house decoration or what?"

8. "Uh.... dude? The shoes? Now, please."


And that as they say, my friends, is that. You really read all the way to the end? Now, that's impressive.


UPDATE at 5:03 Kiki played. Who's next?